Growing Pains


Woken from nightmares again …

What if’s and Why did I’s

raining down like volcano ash;

suffocating,

gray,

smothering the light

that sets free.

What if I simply slipped back into winter, frozen and numb?

Why did I let myself begin to burn?

What if I ran again …

from him, from her, from the dreams?

Why did I let myself be seen?

What if I went back into hiding?

Why did I step from the shadows at all?

What if I gave back into fear?

Why did I ever believe their lies?

cswhitlow

Advertisements

Lost

Oh my darling…

 

I do not worry when you rage,

When your passion calls for blood to spill,

When your anger articulates sharply,

When your spirit churns,

No,

I do not worry then.

 

Oh, but my darling…

 

When your rage falls silent,

When your passionate words cease ,

When your anger dissolves into resignation,

When all grows still and quiet,

Then,

Do I fear…

It is then,

I know I have lost you.

 

cswhitlow

Afraid

I am afraid of her…

She whispered.

 

I am afraid of falling,

And I am afraid of the standing still.

 

I am afraid of staying numb forever,

Unmoved and frozen in worn out armor,

And I am afraid of the exposure,

Of catching fire under a blinding sun.

 

I am afraid the roots of loneliness

Have grown too far-reaching,

Too deep to be torn to the surface,

And I am afraid my love

is a storm tossed ship lost at sea.

 

I am afraid these broken pieces

Left behind from so many sorrows,

Are too sharp for innocent mortals,

And I am afraid I don’t quite recognize myself

When whole and happy.

 

I am afraid of all that’s hidden inside me…

The passion, the hate, the wild wind,

The sorrow, the overwhelming joy,

The untapped ocean depth,

And I am afraid it can no longer stay contained.

 

I am afraid…

And I am choosing to be brave.

 

cswhitlow

Their Favorite Coffee Shop

He watches her,

From across their favorite coffee shop,

Revels secretly at the sight of her

Getting lost…

Words,

Phrases,

lines,

crafted ages ago,

In another time,

In other places,

About other loves…

Ink on paper,

Heartbeats etched into exquisite lines,

Passion bled from dark poets

And tormented souls.

Her breath catches,

Her eyes close briefly in silent wonder,

Swirls of fragrant steam forgotten

In the mug beside her.

He watches her,

From across their favorite coffee shop,

Envious of the words that could

Ignite such a soul.

cswhitlow

Watch it Burn 

Light the match.

Fan the flames.

Watch it burn….

 

That girl you used to be.

The weakness soaked in excuses.

The regrets that have paralyzed.

The fear you’ve danced with too long.

The demons that wrestle against your resolve.

The bridges that keep you shackled,

To a place that no longer knows your name.

 

Light the match.

Fan the flames.

Watch it burn.

 

And rise.

 

cswhitlow